This post may contain affiliate links. If you click an affiliate link and make a purchase, I may earn a commission. Also, as an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.--
Folks – it really is time to name your bikes!
A bicycle without a name is just a clanking lump of rubber and metal. Add a name, and it becomes…so much more! A part of the family, an extension of your soul, and a sentient being in its own right.
If you’re pretty sure your bike is a male, then you’ve landed on the right page (because male nicknames for bikes are what this post is all about).
I have macho names if you’re trying to look as hard as possible to impress the ladies…
Badass names if you think your bike likes to play rough and loose with the law…
Cultural names (think Wolfgang for a few ancient composer vibes going on)…
Fictional male names…
Famous cyclists for all you hardcore bicycle buffs (we know you’re out there)…
And so much more!
So, let’s dive into the names:
Macho Bike Names
Let’s start with the testosterone really pumping. Let’s go for the manliest, macho, hairy-chested names first to get this thing in full swing.
Think mighty God of Thunder smiting the earth with his hammer. That’s the type of manliness we’re talking about here.
This name could be the name of any bicycle that looks a bit like sporting legend and super-manly guy Mike Tyson. Think short, bristling with muscles, and garnering immense power.
Think of a kind of fat bike with giant wheels ready to reek damage on even the most far-flung towpath. That’s what I’m talking about.
Another warlike and brutal slayer – something like a 29er mountain bike with stainless steel rear hub gleaming in the sunlight.
Wolverine was a mutant – so perhaps a fitting name for a hybrid bike maybe?
And, of course, if your hybrid has retractable spikes sticking out the side then even better.
Got a bike that looks a bit murderous and threatening. What better than to give it the name of everyone’s favorite fishy predator – Jaws?
I’ve tried to be a bit creative with this one. Don’t ask me what it means!
Any big, clunky bike would suit this. Maybe it’s got some kind of large basket on it (that’s the shovel head bit).
This name would suit a seriously ripped and pumped-up bike! Hasta la vista, to all other bikes in its wake.
Arnie would be your knobbly, bristling mountain bike with giant tires ready to tear up the steepest hillside.
This bike would have to be fast. Fat bike – no. Some kind of Tour de France road bike with precision engineering – yes.
This would be ideal for any bike that swoops and soars like the finest birds of prey out there.
Think graceful road bike, with aerodynamic styling of the highest ilk.
Think rippling front tire, and stampeding gear system, on this cattle-named beast.
Badass Male Bike Names
So you think you’ve got a bit of an outlier of a machine. One that lives as a fugitive, in constant opposition with the laws of the land.
Well, what better than to give it a badass name?
The quintessential cannibal! (You can use the word ‘quintessential’ to describe a cannibal – right?)
This is for bikes that chew up trails like a liver.
Or gnash on roads like a nice piece of thigh.
This is perhaps going slightly over the top, but this is the name of the freakish serial killer from the Saw films.
This guy loves trapping people in boxes of spikes and the like – so if your bike looks like a kind of death trap then this could be the way to go.
I’m not sure if you’ve seen this weird guy from old films! A truly terrifying bald vampire dude, this would really suit any bike that looked a bit spiky and creepy looking.
Aha! The devil child.
Any blood-red, mean-looking machine would suit this name.
15. Norman Bates
The original creepy serial killer. Lovely stuff.
I’m not sure why on earth you would own a bike that would remind you of this strange character, but if you did, stay away from any lonesome bike tours visiting far-flung motels. They won’t end well.
Famous Cyclist Nicknames For Your Bike
Let’s add a section now for all you serious cycling geeks out there. Here is a selection of names of some of the greatest names from the cycling world.
If this is the inspiration you need to get out on your bike every day, then great! Naming your bike after one of these is the way to go.
Let’s start with the great man! Eddie Merckx.
This name is synonymous with style, class, and achievement. So, if this sounds like you (and you don’t have to be modest), this is a great name to pick.
Another Tour de France legend here.
I once heard that Miguel Indurain’s standing heartbeat was only 28 beats per minute.
18. Lance (Armstrong)
Bit more of a controversial choice here! Disgraced drug-cheat Lance Armstrong.
This former seven-time winner of the Tour de France was later stripped of all his titles following his disclosure as being a renowned drug cheat.
I just love how this name evokes the feeling of speed and power!
Chris Froome is a four-time Tour de France winner and general all-round cycling legend.
Even better, his name just sounds like the kind of thing you’d shout when pedaling at top speed down a steep incline – ‘Frooooome!’ This could be the ideal name for your bike.
Another cool, short name. Chris Hoy is an Olympic cycling legend.
Hoy just sounds like a bike’s name as well. Hoy!
21. Dwight Shrute
I had to get this guy into this list! The ultimate sitcom character.
Got a bike that’s a bit awkward looking? This could be a Dwight.
22. Mr. Bean
Think very think road-bikes that are a bit past their prime for this name.
Nothing particularly hi-tech or robust will really work.
This is the other end of the spectrum from the Mr. Bean bike.
This bike is rippling with power and force.
It is particularly well suited to aquaplaning through fjords, puddles, streams, and rivers.
Marlon Brando’s character in this film literally gives me the chills.
A bike called Godfather would have to ooze authority and power.
A bicycle that can really own the road like no other.
This is the name of Jim Carrey’s character from Dumb and Dumber.
Basically, a real wreck of a bike held together with duct tape and lots of odd screws.
Great Male Names From Culture
Let’s go a bit touchy-feely and arty for just a sec. All the following names are evocative of great artists, writers, or other cultural figures.
These names could be just what you need to really inspire you, and get you out and about.
This is a real masterpiece of a bike – the absolute summit of human endeavor.
It would have to be a high-quality machine and one that can take on any obstacle or tricky terrain, and breeze over them like they were hardly there.
This was the Russian author of War and Peace, one of the longest novels ever written.
So, if you’re a fan of riding massive distances on your bike, then Tolstoy could be the kind of enduring, long-distance name that you’re looking for.
Think modern bike with a really groovy edge.
A bike called Warhol would be uniquely fashionable, yet kind of hard to fully understand.
29. Jackson Pollock
This was the guy that made millions from throwing paint on a canvas.
If your cycling style is pretty rocky or a bit scatty then this could be the way to go.
This is for a bike that is perfect on open expanses, and out on the American high road.
This is a bike of freedom and seeing the world.
This is a bike for the quintessential man’s man.
The rugged machine, out on the open road, cruising from raw experience to raw experience.
Traditional Male Names
Achilles famously had just one weakness – a dodgy ankle that ended up getting shot by a poisoned arrow.
So, if you have a bike that maybe has a tire that always deflates or one wheel that squeaks, Achilles could be the way to go.
This is a name of magic and unearthly power! Also, any bike that is 20 years old or more deserved this ancient moniker.
This guy was a kind of badass ruler.
If you’ve got a bike that’s hard to control, and perhaps likes swerving off the straight and narrow, this could be the one to go for.
35. Sitting Bull
Think calmness and a sense of great majesty and poise in this name. This is for your stately bike that corners like a dream and rolls silently down hills.
I think this guy was a Roman Emperor.
So if you’ve got a bike that is fit for a chariot for royalty, this could be the name for you.
This rotund world leader was one of the inspirations of the free world in World War 2.
If you’ve got a chunky yet determined bike, that will overcome any obstacle, then Churchill is the name you’re looking for.